I Was a Social Hierarchy Casualty

I remember when I was in elementary school I had the greatest friends ever. But then we moved up to junior high. My great friends got elected to be student body officers, made the cheer leading squad, and other things, and suddenly no longer had time for a nobody like me. All through junior high and high school, I never really had friends that I would hang out with on the weekends. While I have recently gotten back in touch with one of my elementary comrades, we didn't really have much to do with each other until the last few weeks or so. In high school, I would be the kid in the movie who would sit with a large group of friends at lunch only to hear them discussing their weekend plans and never be invited. In essence, I was a casualty of the social hierarchy that is rampant in our educational system. I really struggled with that for a long time, especially when I realized that one of my friends I had met in 7th grade and remained friends with until my senior year turned out to be something less than a good friend. Of course she had been doing it to me for years, but I was too dense to see it happening.

Any way, the whole reason I've been considering this lately is because I see all the bully girls in the 5th grade at my school and it makes me mad! The best (or worst) example of this hit a head a couple of weeks ago when she attempted to bully the teachers and the Principal. Apparently the little gem had been sick, like many of our students. So, her dad sent a note for her to stay in from recess. Not a problem . . . we can accommodate that. So, she stayed in for a day. The next day, she went outside for morning recess and tried to convince all of the fifth grade teachers that she was supposed to stay in for lunch recess. Right . . . . like we were going for that knowing she had already gone out to recess once that day. So, we kicked her out. Well, dad was not pleased, to say the least. He sent a totally mature and appropriate note to Miss Alexander chewing her out and asking if she could read. Well, RUDE!!! All of us were irate in her behalf. During music that day, this little gem was acting quite smug and proud of herself, knowing that her daddy had stuck up for her one more time. As a result, she was not following directions. I called her on it and got a HUGE glare in return. Then, she got up from where she was sitting, walked all the way around the classroom, and sat somewhere else. I told her to go back to where she had been. Her response? "I don't want to." Seriously . . . I had NO idea kids can ooze with such a putrid amount of attitude that early. So, I kicked her out of class with three strikes: she already had one, I gave her one for not following directions, and one for talking back to me. Of course, dad was not pleased. He came into school and proceeded to chew out the principal. Of course, she wasn't having any of that. She explained very pointedly that Miss Alexander had not kicked his daughter out of class . . . it had been Miss Barney. She continued to outline all the bully problems and attitude problems this little darling has at school with her classmates, ALL the 5th grade teachers, and herself. Dad was abashed . . . and went off without rescuing his daughter from the evil 5th grade teachers. Chalk that up as a win for public educators!

The moral of the story? I may have been a social hierarchy casualty in junior high and high school, but I've got a pretty good support system that helps me kick the whole blasted thing down when it comes right down to it!